There was a time where I would walk with stooped shoulders staring at the ground. From time to time I would sit feeling melancholy and reach into the sack I had been carrying around. I would pull out a regret; which starts as a lump of coal, from the many in the bag and take my polishing rag and spend some time buffing it. I had done it so often that some of lumps of coal had turned into diamonds. Then I would put them back in the sack and pick it up and carry on.
Then one day I was looking at the sack of coals and diamonds and realized that regret is not meant to be carried. Instead regret is simply a wake up call from living an unaware life. It is a statement that a situation was not handled in a way that is congruent with whom you want to be. It is a gap from your actual conduct of living and your vision of what you want to stand for. It is a reminder that you are not always perfect and there is still room to grow.
So for a final time I took all of my regrets and examined them one more time and asked.
What lesson was I being taught?
- Not being fully present when someone just needed to get a problem out of their bag. Not to judge, comment or tell how to handle it. Just be there.
- Not considering how judgmental I was in many situations when I was giving my advice.
- Not giving my understanding, love and support while someone was working on a their problem.
- Taking out my own frustrations on someone and then being hurt by their response.
- .... many other lessons I needed to have.
Today I try to be present at all times and when I slip and have regrets; I immediately take whatever actions I need to to rectify it. Sometimes I can't and learn the lesson and refuse to carry it around. Life is far more enjoyable and I am happier.
Isn't time for you to dump your sack?