Sunday, July 15, 2007

Demons of Desire

Have you noticed that things we have intensely desired soon becomes rather ordinary and no longer endowed with the almost mystical aura that they had before we got it?

If we look at what typically happens we would see that we start with a desire for something. We think about it and start to build a rationale for why we want it. We will create elaborate logical arguments to justify and support why we want it to ourselves and others.

We can do an excellent job on selling ourselves on all of the plus benefits that we will receive and downplay or ignore any negative points. We have lost our perspective. At this stage driven by the demons of desire it has become an absolute need and must be satisfied. 

After we have what we desired and the shine has worn off then the things we pushed aside or ignored come back to haunt us.

The key distinction we need to make before we start down the road is whether it is a need or a desire and keep that in mind as we look at the pros or cons of obtaining it and not fall into the trap of mistaking a desire for a need.

Have you ever found that once you obtained something that you wondered why you ever got it? Do you have a way of dealing with this issue? Your thoughts.

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8 conversations:

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

can't say that i have peter. not really. what comes to mind for me is our home in podunk. we bought it in 1993 as a vacation home. we wanted to come as often as possible and sometimes came for a three day weekend bearing the 11 hour drive each way. but the glow never wore off for us, even now when we come for four months at a time. still love it!

smiles, bee

Peter Haslam said...

Yes you are right Bee not all desires are wrong as it should be just a perspective for those who often find themselves in this situation

Pam said...

Yep. My management job. I sold myself on the money and the career advancement, and realized too late that I'm much happier managing only myself and my workload and minimizing the time I spend dealing with meetings and politics!

Peter Haslam said...

Been there to Pam thank you for your addition

Comedy + said...

There is very little that I have to have. I am not a shopper, so I don't drool over things. I see what you are saying though. I see kids doing this all the time and as soon as they get whatever it is they will die without they lose interest.

I have been the planner. If I wanted something I would plan for it. Some things took years to get...like a home. So, I'm happy to say no...I'm not the desire driven type of gal...Well, there have been a few men, but I won't go there. Have a great day Peter. :)

Peter Haslam said...

No I won't go there Sandee :) good addition

Gerri said...

This is SO true! I forced myself to be sensible when I recently got a new car because I had built myself up to want and desire a different and much more expensive car. In the end I stayed sensible and I'm glad I did. I'm completely happy with the car.. but still a part of me wants that luxury sedan I had my eye on. However, I do realize that even if I had gotten the luxury car I would not be any happier than I am now. The thrill of the purchase would have worn off by now. I think there is desire and then the thrill of aquisition.. and then the letdown. So I decided to try to stay on an even keep this time to aviod the letdown phase.

Peter Haslam said...

I agree gerri difficult to resist the siren call of our desire